Posted in Poetry

Those Who Wander

There they are, weaving, braking, menacing their innocent way along the bad dream that is I-4. This highway that has more deaths per mile than any other interstate in the nation and it is under a decade-long face-lift. Wrinkles are being removed and crooked bones straightened. Even the locals find it hard to know where the lane lines are, as they text and apply make-up on their morning Orlando commute. But there they are; Tourists. Herds of them arrive every winter from every state and every part of the world.  They are here for our World, Disney, that is. Land of Mickey and home of Harry (Potter – he and Ron and Hermione reside at Universal). So, as I was saying, there they are, weaving, braking, menacing, all in the left lane of the dreaded I-4. Weaving, you ask? That occurs when they spot the Central Casting building for the Magical World, which is, of course, right along I-4. We know them, these Tourists, they have licence plates from places where it is currently snowing and cold and bumper stickers that proclaim their undying allegiance to Epcot. That’s the place with the giant golf ball, in case you didn’t know. They have an event called Drinking Around the World. This car full of Tourists may have already been there for all of their weaving, breaking, menacing.  Florida drivers are known for driving fast; really, really fast. It’s only because we value our lives and want to get quickly around this car full of Tourists.

I floor it and buzz-lightyear past them.  Whew! Made it. Oh no! Look! Just ahead… it’s another one, only bigger! An RV, towing a small vehicle, complete with bike racks and coolers that are mostly strapped down. And what are they doing? Well, you know the routine.

natives garbed in coats
travelers bikini clad
locals travailing

© Jilly’s All Rights Reserved

Join me as I host Unconventional Haibun at dVerse this week!

Author:

A wild soul writing poetry.

59 thoughts on “Those Who Wander

  1. Oh yes! You nailed it! Tourist season is one of our biggest kigos in Florida (next to snarky northerners who can barely manage a “well, that was interesting” through their tightly-gritted teeth. I love your trip down the Bash-oh! Highway.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for catching that, Dwight! Of the three places I’ve lived most of my life, all are tourist-driven, so I love visitors and the cultures and languages they bring. Although, I must admit, when I was in Carolina the visitors mostly spoke English 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Love this Silly. Here in Arizona we have ‘snowbird season’, and things definitely get tricky. I think I prefer the 188 degree heat in summer over navigating a grocery store parking lot in winter. 🙂

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  3. Hah! “locals travailing” — love that line! Oh yes — I think folks who live on Cape Cod can relate to this. Memorial Day weekend starts the continual traffic jam on the bridge from “main land MA to Cape Cod” — yes, tourism is their livelihood but it’s also true. Locals stand atop the pedestrian bridge at that same spot on the Monday of Labor Day weekend and wave goodbye to everyone with a sigh of blessed relief.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. LOL! The traffic you describe is akin to Miami’s traffic! Where they put the left turn signal on at 7am and leave it there all day. Your haibun truly got me anxious! I am a terrible driver.

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  5. Thanks for hosting; loved your terse haibun. In the Pacific NW, we live close to the state fairgrounds, and the two weeks of the fair we get a couple of mullion tourists. Our normal daily work traffic is third worst in the nation; makes me glad I’m retired.

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  6. This was funny…only from the perspective that I’m likely to be one of those tourists weaving and pointing 🙂 . Love how you use travailing for the locals….it’s hard work being a host (especially to a throng you didn’t bargain for!)

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  7. What a brilliant evocation of tourist season. We have it down here in Oz too during our summer months. Last summer we had hordes of tourists from China driving the Great Ocean Road in hire cars. We drive on the opposite side of the road here and many international tourists get confused. Last summer there was news footage of drivers rounding the bends in the ocean road on the wrong side of the road. Some would even stop in the middle of the road to take photos.
    I know what you mean about the giant RV’s towing smaller vehicles. We get ones like that too. Many has bikes strapped on the back of the bigger vehicle and a small boat on top of it too. 🙂

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  8. Tourist season here in the Northwest means very quiet winters, lack of income for businesses….regardless, it’s a time to get to know people from everywhere, that we are all pretty much the same. 😊

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  9. My idea of hell! Luckily, in our sleepy little village we don’t get too many tourists; just the people boating on the Norfolk Broads who follow the dyke up to the moorings to stop off for a pint or a meal at the local pub.However, they can be really annoying. At the weekend, my husband had just got out of the shower when he spotted a stranger in the garden. He was fetching his two dogs that had strayed into our garden. Thank goodness the cats were indoors and there were no deer grazing on the long grass at the time. Needless to say, I heard a few expletives!

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    1. Oh, that’s a story – maybe even a poem!
      We live too far from the ‘attractions’ to have that sort of thing. I enjoy the tourists and will share insider secrets about places to go and things to do that are not on any lists.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Ah, zoning out amid the constant stream of reckless drivers, sparkly castles in their eyes and what not. I don’t see the appeal myself, but I think for you it must be hard to have to frequent this deadly stretch of highway. We have to deal with hordes of tourists year-round here in the mountains, but especially now. It can be an Olympic sport navigating the narrow, twisty, steep roads of the Colorado Rockies, all while passing RVs and dodging elk!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. We have tourists where I am but not at the Disney World level, bless your heart, and your patience. (loved Charlie’s comment that tourist is a kigo, haha!) Had to laugh at your contrast of the locals dressing for “cold” weather and the tourists in bikinis. Another funny one, Jilly!

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