Posted in 28 Days of Unreason, Poetry

You

You are not the music that plays in my head
     drum of my soul

You are not the light of my dismal life
     lightning blues in the clouds

You are not the taste of liquor on my tongue
     crushed Concords drenching my face

You are not my shining star
     galaxy, flat as between the hands of God

© Jilly’s All Rights Reserved

for Day 7 of 28 Days of Unreason & dVerse Meeting the Bar & for You

“What beauty in this the darkest music
over which you can hear the lightest music of human
behavior, the tender connection between men and galaxies.”  ~ Jim Harrison
from Warbler / Dead Man’s Float

 

Author:

A wild soul writing poetry.

43 thoughts on “You

  1. There is a lot here that is very special. Reading and re-reading. Lightning blues, grape crushing and drenching with wine, and that last line, god playing flatty-cake with the galaxy…

    Liked by 1 person

  2. What a beautiful paean of love! That you respond to Harrison and Audioslave says a lot about the rocking poet you are, Jilly! You must really kick a– in the classroom. Shakespeare amplified!

    Back to the poem… the “you” in this poem is fortunate; they have attained a place of praise and honor according to the poet’s voice. Well done!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I really enjoy this type of poetry – I teach the Sonnets to my students and they find it intriguing.The rejection echoes are inspired by that Audio Slave song, so I had lots of help.

      Like

  3. I love the shape, the form and the ‘distorted’ positive echoes (or reverbs) in this poem, Jill! It’s full of sense-awakening imagery. I especially enjoyed ‘lightning blues in the clouds’ and ‘galaxy, flat as between the hands of God’.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I like the power of God expressed in a capacity to flatten the universe – the uncreator -and the whole contrariness of the poem’s tone with its two voices. Uniquely creative Jilly

    Liked by 1 person

    1. So glad! Just one speculative way of looking at the fact that our galaxy is relatively flat – kind of blows holes in some of the scientific theories. There are a bunch of ‘we don’t knows’ orbiting our collective knowledge and that feeds poetry 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

  5. Beautiful images here, Jilly. I found myself going back to read it several times. I saw in a comment that you enjoyed writing in the Via Negativa. I did too. Great prompt from Bjorn.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s