Posted in 28 Days of Unreason, Poetry

Vital Needs

“I feel my failure intensely
as if it were a vital organ”
from Vows

Passed a tree
bare-bone branches
beige against
the too, too green
field and well-watered
backdrop of triumphant trees
in early June leaf.

The sun, first in days,
in weeks
(for he, too, has failed)
pointed out the obvious
raw skin of bark.

I turned my head
and watched
long after it had gone by
the after-image burned
on my retina.

Woke in the night
longing for that tree
as I long for the feel
of my own bare skin
when you are gone.

© Jilly’s  All Rights Reserved

for Day 3 of the 28 Days of Unreason


A wild soul writing poetry.

11 thoughts on “Vital Needs

  1. “…longing for that tree
    as I long for the feel
    of my own bare skin
    when you are gone.”

    Fairly universal – very visceral. You have captured a sense of what it’s like to have something speak to you in the visual and not be able to put into words the message. It speaks to a deeper you. That’s what this poem did for me!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Charley. I really did pass just such a tree recently and the image seemed to fit with the idea of failure, which seemed to allow for a metaphor for human failure.


      1. I see that now. The triumphant trees verses “the failure,” the failed sun… but the narrator still takes on the blame when neither the tree or the sun are at fault. Just needed to talk it through a bit… I’m a tad slow sometimes.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. you have a knack of burning images into words Jilly – interesting way you make the tree move and the watcher stand still. Nicely rounded off at the end with a paradox

    Liked by 1 person

  3. “I long for the feel
    of my own bare skin
    when you are gone.”

    Very cool. Had to think it over a couple of times, says something very subtle but interesting and true. Nice job!

    Liked by 1 person

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