The Somonka is a Japanese poetic form that is designed to be collaborative, so it is perfect that Imelda chose that as her challenge for Casting Bricks. A Somonka is a love poem in the form of two Tankas. One lover writes the first 5 lines and the other responds with a second Tanka. Imelda’s Tanka, Loss, is in bold and my response follows. Please forgive my incorrect usage of the language and my verbing of a noun.
Jilly’s August Challenge known as “Casting Bricks” is open to anyone who would care to join in; the more the merrier! There is a permalink on my right-hand side bar or you can click here for details.
Moon, lost in orbit
looking for its sun, I am
a gaping silence
devouring your memory
an altar of your absence
Sun, novaed out from
your binding gravital pull
pulsing here alone
no dark to hide my wonder
if you ever think of me.
© Collaborative Poetry
Santore/Lyman
Never apologize for verbing nouns or nominalizing verbs in poetry. The whole toy box is there for us to play with!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Sarah! However, some of my readers are ruffled by it, so I feel the need to make a disclaimer – “No verbs were harmed in the writing of this poem.’ 😉
LikeLike
You did a great job completing her opening, Jill! Novaing and novaed are perfectly acceptable verbanouns. I find them in my poet’s dictionary; right where I penned them in. …um, not as in corral, but as in ink.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you! I kinda liked that image of wild Verbanouns running around in the corral, just waiting to be saddled, broke and ridden. Oh well…
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yeehaw-ing.
LikeLiked by 1 person
“no dark to hide my wonder” is a great line, and the pickup of it in the last line is perfect.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I actually started this one with that last line. Thanks!
LikeLike
First of all, thank you very much for this response. 🙂
I like it for highlighting the complementary relationship between the sun and moon, on the one hand, and the subjects of the poem, on the other. Though at first blush, there seems to be a disparity in images, one being greater or smaller, brighter or darker than the other, in your piece, each one benefits from the other’s gifts, and in that sense, compleyes the other. Well done. 👍💛
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂
LikeLike