Posted in Photos, Poetry, Uncategorized

Aye; Eyes

In faces we see years, or the lack thereof, tones of skin, lips of color and grin stretching out to welcome us or drawn tight to hide away the pain of days and nights, winters and spring, of living too much or not enough, walking the path to the river or the River, the dip of birth or the dip of death, the planting or harvesting, and as we walk by them, in the water, in the grass, in the tree or air, it is not in their faces that the story lies, it is in their eyes, their eyes, their eyes.

Eyes looking outward

Skeptical angry or no

The tale is thereby told

We are writing Haibuns over at dVerse tonight. ย Join us!

ยฉ Words & Photos by Jilly ย All Rights Reserved


A wild soul writing poetry.

58 thoughts on “Aye; Eyes

  1. A brilliant haibun! Although, I think I get more out of that gator’s smile… his eyes are those of a poker player! You take us through life’s experiences… and, indeed, it’s the eyes.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I often write a free verse poem and then remove the line breaks for my haibun. It’s how I learned years ago to write the prose portion. and sometimes I still do it. I love the photos!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. That’s fine too. Just don’t forget the season words in the haiku. The season words tell you the when of the haiku and is important

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      2. Hey, as long as you keep trying and writing, that is all that matters. I taught the writing of haiku years ago and it is hard to get out of the habit. Forms with a bunch of rhymes and rhythms are mos def not my strong suit.


    1. He’s an alligator, and he was hiding quite nicely in the duck weed, but he submitted to the camera for about 5 mintues. He followed me with his eyes which told a prehistoric story without words.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, Jane. When I work on fiction I fall easily into something fairly lyric. Sometimes it works, and sometimes it slows the pace, so I am conscious of it.


    1. Thank you, Sarah, I really value your opinion. I want something of the chatty but my fingers just don’t go there on the keys – will have to have a chat with them!


  3. You are so right, Jilly. I find the eyes tell such a story. I have encountered people who frighten me and those I know I would love to sit down with and share a cup of tea. I also find, though, in the wrinkles there are stories to be found of joy or hard times.

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    1. ๐Ÿ™‚ Thank you! We had a gator in our lake last week, fairly small guy, and the local kids were baiting it with a fishing line and then throwing stuff at it. We chased them off (state laws against feeding or harassing), but the damage may be done. They learn aggression and then they have to be ‘relocated’ – the gators, not the kids.

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  4. Well, I’m afraid my small Chinese eyes can’t tell big stories. ๐Ÿ™‚ Do agree with the above — marvellous prose, with a lyrical style so distinctively yours. I also like the natural lightness in your haibun — quite American, in a good way, of course. ๐Ÿ™‚

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    1. I fear I don’t do the Japanese forms well. I fair better when I remember that Basho said to learn the rules and then break them. I’m good at breaking the poetic rules, if nothing else ๐Ÿ™‚

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      1. Everyone has a unique poetic voice — not a difference of quality, I don’t think. So … break โ€™em, adjust it, like tailoring clothes for ourselves after trying it on. (As much as I would like to squeeze myself into a slimmer pair of jeans … I can’t!)

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  5. The eyes have it! Love your haibun and photos, especially the gator one. I didn’t even notice his head at first he’s so well hidden. I saw the back of him and had to slowly track upward. How’d I miss those teeth?!

    Liked by 1 person

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